Looking in the mirror

If I'm going to be a more real version of myself as I discussed the other day then I need to confront the mirror. I have to be honest, but not harsh and figure out who I am. I was lucky enough to be reminded by an old friend that at my core I am good person, a good friend and a good listener.

This is one of the most challenging tasks that I have set upon myself.

I look at myself and see a short, curvy Italian girl with a mess of curls and hazel eyes. Catch me on a good day and you'll find the gold in my eyes. I'm one who has had to train herself not to talk so much with her hands and gesture less.

I am one who has intense emotions, and I struggle to realize that not everyone feels things as deeply as I do. I will love you fiercely and strongly. I will fight for you before I fight for myself. And it's not because I'm not important, but because I want you to succeed. I will empathize with your situations and feel your pain with you.

I am moved by words and songs. Music can bring me to tears, and so can words. Happy tears and sad tears are a part of my life. It doesn't mean that I am crier, but it goes back to my intense emotions.

I am one determined woman. Tell me I can't, and I'll do my best to prove you wrong. What I may lack I will put forth in my drive to succeed and excel. You will NOT hold me back. This part of me is challenging to write about as it was such a core part of me that went into hiding for a few years. I have spent the summer bringing it back out and I am sure that the reemergence of this has helped ground me.

I am one who looks for the best in everyone. I don't always look for the best in every situation, but I try. I'm not a Pollyanna, but I've been making a conscious effort to not be the downer that I was over the past few years.

I am a caretaker. I enjoy taking care of people, but I do it with such intensity that it can burn me out. And because of my intensity I expect others to be able to care for me with similar intensity in return. I don't want to "fix" you, but help you mend yourself.

I am a mother. I have 4 amazing children who are my world.

I am a runner.

I am a pediatric physical therapist and certified Epic Clinical Builder.

I am a Doctor of Philosophy with a specialty in Rehabilitation Sciences.

I am a survivor.