So, we just found out our initial application has been "turned down" and is now off for a "2nd level review," ie management review. At this point hubby and I are beyond frustrated and those cardboard boxes are starting to look like shelter, as homelessness looms closer. Did I ever think I would find myself in this situation? I am a married, 34 year old mother of 4 with a freaking PhD and full-time employment and full-time employed husband, so in short NO!
It all comes down to the fact that the last few years while I was finishing my PhD we had financial woes. I feel like we are being penalized severely for making the choices we thought best at the time, which was usually between making a late payment and doing the "hope and a prayer that this check doesn't bounce" plan. Yes, I know the optimal thing is to NOT find yourself in that situation but we did and now we are paying the price. It makes me wish that the financial institutions in this nation hadn't so royally screwed us all over in the past 8 years, because now reality has hit and it BITES! I can logically understand that they are reviewing the evidence in front of them, but my heart and head don't always line up.
I feel like if I could just TALK to the reviewer, maybe, just maybe, it would make a difference. We wrote our letters, but how do you really explain in a letter, and keep it brief at the same time, your life story and how you ended up where you ended up. I mean, I want to ask them, have you had to tell your child, no you can't have that veggie/fruit/cereal today because it's not on sale/I don't have a coupon/it's not in the budget for weeks on end. I want to ask them have you tried to feed a family of six on WIC checks alone, which FYI is meant to be a supplemental food program, not a sustaining food program. I want to say that this is America, where we are supposed to be able to pursue our dreams, and now we are being penalized for following our dream. And not because we purchased crap or were irresponsible, but because we bought groceries and medication for my diabetic husband and asthmatic children and gas. And in all reality, we purchased minimal medication for my diabetic husband the last 6 months of my schooling, so we would have more money for food. Why should his health have to suffer so that I can feed my family when I have health insurance, but can't afford the co-pays on the medication? I can't even explain all the swirling emotions at this point.
We are supposed to take a little mini family vacation this upcoming week and both hubby and I want to cancel it, because we need to find housing and because of the reality that I KNOW I will feel guilty spending money on a much needed mental health break, when I could be putting it towards our debt. And, as I sit here and type this while my little 2 sleep and my big 2 put away the groceries we just purchased for our trip the tears just pour down. I also know that a lot of the world will judge us for taking this vacation, but I am a firm believer in mental health and both hubby and I need the time away. So please don't judge when you see people posting about money woes and then taking a trip or going out to eat. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, deserves some type of mental health break. And for the record we are going tent camping on Lake Ontario and taking our kids to Niagara Falls and attending a family picnic, so it's not an expensive vacation and it will only be Wednesday to Sunday, but still I feel guilt and judgement.
So I am asking my readers, friends, families and all of you to please pray for us. Hubby and I are continuing to explore options and need we need those on the receiving ends of our requests to keep an open mind and heart.
Monday, June 30, 2014
Wednesday, June 25, 2014
The Housing Saga: Underwrite Update
So we submitted that boatload of paperwork to the underwriter last week. Mr. Finance Guy said it could be possibly be ready so that we could look at houses last weekend (6/21/14), well we heard nothing, so we visited more open houses. Oh joy.......
We waited patiently (at least as patiently as possible) and contacted Mr. Finance Guy Monday afternoon. He checked on our file and it had not been touched yet. Luckily for us he is a nice guy and pushed it up the management chain to get it reviewed. We received our feedback this afternoon and we are neither approved or denied. I feel like my life is now a multiple choice question. Our file is "suspended" until we provide them with more paperwork, maybe even a DNA sample, heck I feel like if they want me to pee in a cup while upside down I will do it just to get this pre-qualification letter. Because until we get this letter we cannot even go LOOK at houses with our agent. Are you frustrated yet? Does this make sense to you? It certainly doesn't to us, but really whatever we need to do to move this process along, and on a positive note, we weren't denied!
So stay tuned for further updates and PLEASE say some prayers, otherwise we have no idea where we will be living as of August 1.
We waited patiently (at least as patiently as possible) and contacted Mr. Finance Guy Monday afternoon. He checked on our file and it had not been touched yet. Luckily for us he is a nice guy and pushed it up the management chain to get it reviewed. We received our feedback this afternoon and we are neither approved or denied. I feel like my life is now a multiple choice question. Our file is "suspended" until we provide them with more paperwork, maybe even a DNA sample, heck I feel like if they want me to pee in a cup while upside down I will do it just to get this pre-qualification letter. Because until we get this letter we cannot even go LOOK at houses with our agent. Are you frustrated yet? Does this make sense to you? It certainly doesn't to us, but really whatever we need to do to move this process along, and on a positive note, we weren't denied!
So stay tuned for further updates and PLEASE say some prayers, otherwise we have no idea where we will be living as of August 1.
The Housing Saga: Financial Letters and Homes
I'm breaking this up into multiple posts to allow you all who know the pieces to read what you want. So after we renewed our lease we called our agent and gave her our timeline. She nicely gave us the number of a financial guy and said to work with him. We contacted him, he ran the credit and gave us what we needed to work on and said we could re-run it in April and proceed from there. We did our work and I called Mr. Finance Guy in April. He said we were days away from running the credit, something about it shouldn't be checked too frequently, honestly I am not a financial person so I'm going with him on this. Well...... he never checked it. It took me over 2 weeks to get back in touch with him and then he tells me he never did the second credit check, mind you it's May at this point and hubby and I are thinking we need to get moving!
In the meantime, we had called our real estate agent and she said she wanted a letter from Mr. Finance Guy that we could take with us house hunting. He wasn't going to write the letter until he ran the credit. At this point hubby and I felt like we were running in circles. So finally Mr. Finance Guy runs the credit and says it looks good to go. We call the agent and give her the weekend that we are available to go house hunting. She says lets go and starts making arrangements, but then we hit a snag. The listing agents don't want our current pre-approval credit letter, they want a pre-qualification letter to even SHOW us a home. Well crap! We don't have that yet, because essentially to get that you send in all your paperwork like you are applying for a mortgage. Crap again! And to give you a time frame this all happened at the end of May, beginning of June.
So Mr. Finance Guy says gather this boatload of paperwork and we will submit it to the underwriter because you have a complex case. Yeah.... like we don't know that. So it went off to the underwriter and we wait.....
Because we can't just wait and envision ourselves being homeless hubby and I have been dragging all 4 kiddos to open houses every Sunday afternoon for the past 3 weekends. When the open houses are done, we then drive by all our homes that we have saved. Are you stressed yet? Because hubby and I sure are, and oh by the way, our nanny is pregnant and her last day of work is August 8, so on top of housing crisis we have to find a new nanny.
In the meantime, we had called our real estate agent and she said she wanted a letter from Mr. Finance Guy that we could take with us house hunting. He wasn't going to write the letter until he ran the credit. At this point hubby and I felt like we were running in circles. So finally Mr. Finance Guy runs the credit and says it looks good to go. We call the agent and give her the weekend that we are available to go house hunting. She says lets go and starts making arrangements, but then we hit a snag. The listing agents don't want our current pre-approval credit letter, they want a pre-qualification letter to even SHOW us a home. Well crap! We don't have that yet, because essentially to get that you send in all your paperwork like you are applying for a mortgage. Crap again! And to give you a time frame this all happened at the end of May, beginning of June.
So Mr. Finance Guy says gather this boatload of paperwork and we will submit it to the underwriter because you have a complex case. Yeah.... like we don't know that. So it went off to the underwriter and we wait.....
Because we can't just wait and envision ourselves being homeless hubby and I have been dragging all 4 kiddos to open houses every Sunday afternoon for the past 3 weekends. When the open houses are done, we then drive by all our homes that we have saved. Are you stressed yet? Because hubby and I sure are, and oh by the way, our nanny is pregnant and her last day of work is August 8, so on top of housing crisis we have to find a new nanny.
The Housing Saga: The Backstory
So in an effort to limit our stress let me share our current struggles. When I accepted my new position at this Children's Hospital hubby and I were not in good financial shape, sum it up of: 4 kids in 4 years, 2 layoffs, medical problems, paycuts and trying to limit how much student loan money we were accepting. Because if you didn't know, I was not a funded graduate student. I paid for my PhD with student loans. I don't regret it, but trying to live off our income and supplement with student loans does not make for a good financial situation, especially as your family grows. Thank God for our families to help us out!
But I digress, so we came house hunting, narrowed down our choices and went to put an offer on a home. Our agent then told us that we needed a pre-qualification letter for to place our offer. Well, we applied for a second mortgage and rightly so the mortgage company denied us. I can't blame them. So there we were about 4 weeks out from my start date and no where to live. Our agent found us this rental home, and we agreed to a 1 year lease. The house fits us, but it's not a great area or great school for our kids. In fact about 2 weeks ago DJ was attacked by the neighbor kid across the street who is 7 by wrapping our garden hose around his neck.... yeah so we are definitely ready to leave this place.
So, our lease was due to be up February 1 and we didn't want to move in the middle of the year so we extended our current lease for another 6 months. We figured that we would have time to get our financial stuff in order and be in a house in June, July at the latest. Sounds like a good plan right? We thought so too, but life happens and, as it always seems to happen this way, hubby and I are struggling with housing right now.
But I digress, so we came house hunting, narrowed down our choices and went to put an offer on a home. Our agent then told us that we needed a pre-qualification letter for to place our offer. Well, we applied for a second mortgage and rightly so the mortgage company denied us. I can't blame them. So there we were about 4 weeks out from my start date and no where to live. Our agent found us this rental home, and we agreed to a 1 year lease. The house fits us, but it's not a great area or great school for our kids. In fact about 2 weeks ago DJ was attacked by the neighbor kid across the street who is 7 by wrapping our garden hose around his neck.... yeah so we are definitely ready to leave this place.
So, our lease was due to be up February 1 and we didn't want to move in the middle of the year so we extended our current lease for another 6 months. We figured that we would have time to get our financial stuff in order and be in a house in June, July at the latest. Sounds like a good plan right? We thought so too, but life happens and, as it always seems to happen this way, hubby and I are struggling with housing right now.
Wednesday, May 21, 2014
Running Thoughts
So.......it has been months since I last updated you all here. Honestly, if I could blog while I run there would be a lot more posts up here on everything from politics to religion to family to stress, etc. But since those masterminds at Google haven't created yet the device to translate my running thoughts directly to my blog, I guess you all just have to wait in suspense.......
So I posted last September having just finished my first race ever, and here I am in May posting again after my second race: another half marathon. Trend anyone? So funny thing is I feel like now instead of fielding the "how do you do it" questions about school and 4 kiddos I get the "what do you do/think about on those long runs?"
So here are some my random thoughts from my amazing race this past Sunday. Which, for the record, I cut off an amazing 6 minutes off my previous time. Thank you Wildwoods!
So I posted last September having just finished my first race ever, and here I am in May posting again after my second race: another half marathon. Trend anyone? So funny thing is I feel like now instead of fielding the "how do you do it" questions about school and 4 kiddos I get the "what do you do/think about on those long runs?"
So here are some my random thoughts from my amazing race this past Sunday. Which, for the record, I cut off an amazing 6 minutes off my previous time. Thank you Wildwoods!
- Mile 0-1 wow.... lots of people, I forgot what running with this many people is like..... Hey! Why can't I hear my music? oh yeah......I turned down the volume earlier
- Mile 1-2 HEY! THERE ARE MY KIDS and HUBBY! (I ran past with a smile and got big high fives!) and then my favorite thought; bathrooms? seriously we're like 20-25 min into our run and you girls have to pee already! Can't you hold it for another 2 hours?
- Mile 4 seriously? only mile 4?
- Mile 6 do I see uphill ahead? I thought this was a flat course
- Mile 7-8 thank goodness I trained hills! that bridge was easy, WHAT?! the turnaround is here, you mean I have to do that bridge again like right now?!
- Mile 9 time for some chapstick......or not (as i dropped it)
- Mile 10 HOME STRETCH BABY! (which for the record I actually yelled out loud, because what's another 3 miles when you have already run 10)
- Mile 11.5 as I pass a volunteer who cheers and says 1.5 more to go, I yelled back to him with a grin "HOME STRETCH BABY!"
- Mile 12.75 THERE ARE MY KIDS and HUBBY! and praise the lord I can see the finish!
There were other thoughts along the way, but honestly I don't really think that much while I run. I just love the mind clearing and cleansing that it brings.
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